Regrettable Decisions
by SecretAngelBlood
Summary: A party filled with drunken teenagers envelopes them. "Maybe we should go somewhere less crowded," he hinted. She didn't need to think, didn't want to. "Lead the way." Now they have 9 months to decide their futures, 9 months to test the boundaries of their love, and 9 months until everything could be gone. AH/AU ALL HUMAN. Mature. Lemonade. FULL SUMMARY INSIDE.
1. Prologue

Clary Fray was a ball of fire itself as she burned her way through the drunken crowd of her cousin, Kyle Garroway's house. She was alight brighter than the disco balls and stage lights that coloured the grand ballroom at the back of the mansion, in her golden lace dress with sparkles and sequins attatched to every centimetre of the material. The sequins reflected a glaring light that made her look like a dangerous planet about to crash and spit flames at anyone who got in the way. People stopped to stare as she passed them and the girls slapped their dates whose jaws dropped at the red haired girl ushered past. She didn't take the attention in her stride, but instead twiddled with her fingers and tugged at her necklace instead of focusing on the looks of envy she was getting.

_Get me out of here_, she thought silently as the bass grew louder and louder through the huge speakers that hung from the roof. It blasted in one of her ears and out the other, making awfully hard to hear herself think, and impossible to hear the ringtone coming from her bra as her mobile tried to say she had an incoming call, tucked away in her short, tightly woven dress. As the lights grew darker and turned a deep amber, Clary let out a breath she hadn't even noticed she was holding. The lights did the opposite to her hair and dress now. Instead of making her a burning star, she blended into the crowd. So as she relaxed and let loose of her tense muscles, Clary's hips starts to swing from side to side almost naturally and her hair swung with them, tickling the back of her neck like mad. The crowd of River View High students laughed with her, drinks in their hands. They still looked at the girl with that judgy, snobbish look that they always carried, but it wasn't as focused and concentrated as it always was. Of course, it was a party. So why was Clary the only one not having fun? The chatter and out-of-tune singing that floated around her head made her dizzy, and the crowded room was making her feel claustraphobic. Maybe she should have listened to Simon... He would be at home playing video games and trying to beat the high score Clary had set on Halo, eating junk food and wearing yet another one of his game tee's.

"We have thirty seconds before Aline comes over here to ask for a dance, so make the greeting quick, little cousin," a large, gentle hand came to rest on Clary's shoulder and Kyle's breath on the back of Clary's neck made the hairs stand up on end.

A huge grin broke out on the girl's face and for the first time that night, she felt genuinly happy. As soon as she was encircled in the boy's arms, she felt safe. Not insecure about the dress that Maia had put her in, or the glares that she was receiving from the neurotic, plastic Barbie doll girls. Just warm and happy. Clary's face moved up to look her cousin in the eye. He looked stunning, as always, in the way that all the girls desired their boyfriends to look at. The dark, shaggy hair and deep brown eyes, the strong arms and body swirling with muscles and biceps. They looked nothing alike. Clary and her short, thin, fragile body and flaming red hair and green eyes were nothing compared to Kyle.

Even with their tight relationship, it didn't stop Clary from wishing they could be best friends instead of relatives. She'd stopped counting how many times she had been introduced to people as 'Kyle Garroway's cousin' or 'A relative of Kyle's'. It wasn't Clary. It was never Clary. Not even Clarissa or 'The exceptional art student.'

The girl went down from her tip toes as he released her and looked up at him once more with a beaming smile.

"So, Clare Bear," Clary cringed at the old nickname, "you're running out of time to congratulate me on my party."

"That would be a lie. I hate parties, you know that."

Kyle let a sly smile spread across his features and nodded in understanding. "I see it now. You just came to see me! Can't stay away, I guess. Not many girls can resist this," he gestured to himself and winked.

Clary pulled a face and pretended to gag. She raised her voice to speak over the music. "First of all, ew. As your cousin, I'm going to pretend you didn't just say that. Secondly, is it too cheesy to say I missed you? Spain for a whole four months, while I've been here suffering without anyone to entertain me, only receiving the briefest email. Which, might I add, each had a photo of you and a _different _girl standing infront of the same place. You know, Aline wouldn't be too impressed with your fifty one-night-stands."

"That's why we're going to keep those girls our little secret, okay Clare?" Kyle placed a hand on her head in an affectionate gesture before ruffling in up and creating new tangles. He was gone in a time span of seconds, probably running somewhere else to hide from his bitch of a girlfriend.

And she was alone again, trying to blend in again before the lights decided to change themselves to a bright green. Clary groaned and tried to stumble over to the drinks table to shelter from the hideous effect that the light had on her dress and hair. If amongst the crowd of drunken teenagers, an elbow was brought backwards, right into the girl's stomach, making her bend over and stumble backwards coughing and clutching her body as sharp pains radiated through it. She cursed under her breathe and took another step to steady herself, wincing as an even deeper, splintering, stabbing pain pounded against her rib cage. She almost thought that the injury from the person's elbow was what made it feel as if her back was being pushed against, until out of the corner of her eye, she spotted another body against her own that was tilted over a bowl of grapefruit punch and holding an almost-empty glass of pink alcohol.

"I – I'm so – so – so sorry!" Clary stammered as she caught grip of the person's shirt and waited for the room to steady itself. At first there were eight eyes. Then six. Then four. Then two. Then one. And then, finally, two came into focus. Two large, rounded, flickering, amber eyes covered by long, blonde eyelashes. At first she was mesmerised by the eyes and clutched on to the boys shirt for a moment longer, not blinking, not breathing, not moving at all. Until she finally looked at the other features. The high cheekbones and golden hair. The scent of vanilla and... Jace. Jace Wayland. She'd seen him, heard of him. He was an icon at River View. All the talk. It was Jace Wayland and nothing but Jace Wayland. But never before had she touched him like this or spoken to him. He was in Clary's classes, but sat up the back flirting and joking with his slut of a girlfriend, Kaelie something. He walked the hallways between classes, stopping to nod and wink and the girls who stopped to stare. He played football every Friday night on the school field. Truthfully, Clary wasn't impressed. And she didn't hesitate to show it to everyone who so mentioned him. She despised the boy and his cocky, arrogant, douche-bag attitude. But after having five-too-many cups of cheap alcohol, the only kind Kyle was able to smuggle from his father's collection, the kindled, raging thoughts of her hatred for the boy were fading away just as quickly as the flame that lit her candle was being blown out.

"Not to worry," he said, gesturing down to his now-alcohol-stained shirt that had been pure white minutes ago. "I've always wanted a pink shirt," Jace shrugged and ran his hands down the sides of his body. "Makes me look more manly, don't you think?"

Clary bit the side of her lip and tilted her head to the side to study him. "I was thinking the _total _opposite actually. But, you know how it is; whatever floats your boat, Blondie."

"So we're already past the stage of friendly gestures and smiles, and right into making nicknames for each other? I don't see why everybody insists on Blondie! Personally, I think if I'm to have a nickname other than Ultimate Sex God, it should be Baron Hotschaft Von Hugenstein. Way more original," the boy nodded, agreeing to his own statement.

Clary choked back a laugh and pretended to be lost in thought for a moment before looking directly into the amber eyes of Jace and shaking her head slowly. "Nah, I like Blondie, and I'm sticking to Blondie."

"But I'm not blonde, my hair is the colour of pure golden radiance given from the Angels above. So remember, golden, not blonde," Jace said. "But because you insist on Blondie, you shall be Ginger."

"I think I'm more red than ginger," Clary frowned and studied a lock of her hair, looking away and focusing on a finger nail instead when the multicoloured flashing lights started to give her a headache. She noticed almost every single other girl in the room giving her dirty looks as she continued to pout and bite her lip, twist her hair and ultimately _flirt _with Jace Wayland. And really, it seemed to be working. There was no stop in conversation or awkward moment.

"What's your real name then Ginger?" he asked more seriously.

"Clary Fairchild."

"Ah, Kyle's cousin. He talks about you a lot," Jace nodded in understanding.

Clary rolled her eyes inwardly and smiled innocently. "The one and only."

"I'm Jace."

"I know," the boy looked at Clary puzzled. "Every single time you pass a girl, they immediately drop all their school books and start drooling over you. Surely you notice."

"Yep," he said, popping the 'P'. "But I try to ignore it, being the modest person I am and all."

Clary snorted and this time didn't stop herself from letting her eyes make a full circle.

As the fast, up-beat song came to an end, another one took it's place. One Clary recognised from the car rides with Simon where he would sing out-of-tune at the top of his lungs.

"Wanna dance?" Jace yelled over top of the bass of the song, holding out a hand and looking down at Clary intently.

She just shook her head and focused her eyes on the alcoholic punch bowl, resisting the urge to grab another cup. "Wouldn't want to upset your girlfriend."

"Who, Kaelie?" Jace let out a loud laugh, tilting his head back and flicking a few strands of loose 'golden' hair out of his eyes. "I'm pretty sure she was playing a little match of tonsil hockey with your dear cousin near the chocolate fountain a while ago. She won't miss me."

Clary ignored the feeling to smile in gladness at the fact that Jace dismissed the Barbie doll in a second and instead refused once more.

"Come on, Ginger. I love this song. And don't you feel the tiniest bit of need to make everyone envious of _you _by dancing with _me_?"

"Fine," Clary sighed in exasperation. "Just one song and then I'm leaving."

And both of their bodies were clamped and pressed tightly together in every place possible and Jace's hands started to roam higher and lower than her waist, travelling over her chest, firmly, but gently. Everything in the room went from warm to hot and sweaty and Clary was suddenly gasping for breath, even in her short dress that would be a top on anyone taller than her. She fidgeted with her necklace again as she noticed Jace's eyes on hers, his hands all the way down to her upper thight, the lowest his hands could reach without having to bend down.

"Am I making you nervious, Ginger?" he asked, laughing as Clary took a step backwards and tripped over his foot in her five-inch heels that Maia had 'insisted' she wear because they made her look 'totally damn hot'. "You're not very good at the whole dancing thing," he observed.

"Lucky I have such an amazing partner then, right?" Clary replied sarcastically.

"Amazing, not just in dancing, but in the looks department, and the charm. See? You're already getting lost in my eyes."

"Ever heard of the saying that goes something along the lines of humble being an attractive trait?"

"Only on ugly people, my dear Ginger, only on ugly people."

The bodies moved together as Clary tried to keep up with the beat, ending up falling over once more, Jace's arms the only thing supporting her clumsy body. _So much easier to dance by yourself_, she thought.

"You are a _lot _more coordinated on the hockey field," Jace muttered. He pulled her body straight back up as if she were no heavier than a leaf.

"You've seen me play hockey?"

"Everyone has, but no one has the nerve to mention it to you. Probably scared you'll whack them with your stick. You're the best on the team, Clary. Dammit, probably the best girl player I've ever seen. Small, but deadly."

"That's the first time you've called me by my actual name," she whispered, ignoring the compliment about her sporting skills.

As the song game to an end, she found herself not ready to let go of the only thing keeping her standing. She clutched on to Jace's arms desperately as the overwhelming feel of the five cups of alcohol she had had rushed over her. It had that effect on her small body, the way the burn flooded her veins, making it hard to her to think clearly. She tried to clear her mind as Jace shouted her name, and when she turned to look at him, there was only a moment to think before their lips were together and pushing on each others forcefully. It wasn't gentle or kind, it was need. Need to be closer. And suddenly their lips weren't enough. Clary's hands tangled themselves in the boy's soft, golden hair and his hands explored her body from her chest, all the way down to her hips, to the small of her back, pushing her so every inch of them that could possibly be touching at that moment, was touching.

"Jace," she breathed his name against his mouth.

When they both came up for air, they were breathless and high from the new energy. "It's suddenly way too hot in here," the boy said. "I know where Kyle's bedroom is, if you..." He let his voice trail off.

The thoughts of being with this boy she had never spoken to before, in her cousin's bedroom, with an overflow of too much alcohol and no limits to where this could stop, didn't even worry her. The drinks were making her crazy, too crazy to weigh the possibilities of where this could end, or _how _it would end.

She didn't want to think. Just for one night, she didn't want to think. So she didn't. Instead, she opened her mouth and spoke.

"Lead the way."

_**Alright, so that's the prologue finished. Thankyou if you stayed with it and read the whole way through. Now please, if you have horrible thoughts, review and let me know! But tone them down. If you send flaming reviews, I will delete them. If you want me to continue, please let me know.**_

_**I also reply to all PM's with any questions, ideas, worries when I get the time and I do appreciate receiving them. **_

_**That's all for now...**_

_**-PrimClove**_

_**PS. Yes, this has been edited. I personally like it a lot better now. I've added the slightest changes, such as from her being a volleyball star to a hocket star. Talking a bit more about Kyle. Ecsetera, ecsetera. **_


	2. Please, Tell Me It's A No

_Hey Readers!_

_Okay, I just looked at my last chapter, the Prologue, and realised how different it was to how I write now. Honestly, I really prefer the way I am now. I won't apologise, because I wrote that chapter a while ago before even publishing it and that's how I was then. I'm in a better place personally now, so it does affect how I am as an author. I hope you guys know that, but I'm telling you know so you don't expect the same style as the last chapter._

_Now, for a while I was deciding what I wanted to do with this chapter, hence the long wait between this and the Prologue. Finally, I've got my head around it and found the notes that I wrote ages ago after losing them when I moved houses!_

_Warning, number one: Don't expect Jace and Clary's relationship to be solved and happy in an instant, otherwise this book will only have a few chapters to it. One of the biggest points apart from the pregnancy and how Clary copes with it, is her relationship and feelings for Jace. It won't solve itself overnight, nor will I let it. Oh, how I love making you suffer, hehe ;)_

_Warning, number two. FINAL WARNING: If you don't like where this story is going, leave... now. I'm serious. Thank you._

_Enjoy, fellow Jace lovers ;)_

_SecretAngelBlood_

The other side of the bed was cold and empty, no evidence that someone had been sleeping there apart from the rip in the pillow, where feathers were still floating around in the wind that was being blown through the slightly open window above Clary's head, and the small piece of paper that lay on the blanket that still lay the memories of last night. It made the girl cringe to even think about what had gone down in the bed she lay in the morning after. There were bruise marks behind her shoulder blades where fingers had dug into her skin, holding her tightly as the boy whispered in her ear. Asking her, warning her. He'd given her an out, and she hadn't taken it. But, he'd had the chance to back away as well. Instead, he had pulled her even closer so her body was pushed against the wall. Even with the agonizing hangover from the alcohol Clary had downed the night before, she remembered that. She remembered everything, from the feel of his touch to the smell of his golden hair, and the way down to the way he whispered her name.

"Damn," Clary whispered, smiling, as she traced her finger gently over her swollen lips. Her other arm reached over to the other side of the bed that was made neatly, and plucked the small piece of yellow note paper off the blanket, her face falling a bit as she started to read.

_**Clary,**_

_**I'm writing this at two in the morning, as you're sleeping and you've taken all of the blankets, leaving me freezing cold. As great as last night was though, I think it would be better for both of us not to mention this to anyone, especially your cousin. Because Kyle will try to beat my ass if he finds out what happened, and I don't want to have to hurt him. If you need to call me, my cell number is on the back of this piece of paper. But, dear God, only use it if your desperate. The sooner we forget, the better. Soon, it will be as if this didn't even happen. Next time though, if you don't want to get yourself into a position where your moaning against a bedroom door, I advise you to avoid the alcohol section of the drinks table, for your own sake.**_

_**Rip this up as soon as you find it to make sure no one finds us out. Also, if you don't want boys coming onto you and not being able to stop themselves, wear something a little less sexy. And that underwear, is a definite no. No to sexy underwear. Which reminds me, that underwear, is with your dress and shoes at the end of the bed.**_

_**Sincerely,**_

_**Your Secret Sex Buddy**_

Clary had to stop herself from choking on the words he had written, or feinting from the lack of information he had given to her to work with. An alibi. No mention of what he told everyone he had gone to do last night, or how she should play along...

And then the realisation of where she was came falling down, as fast as her dress had as it was unzipped by her own clumsy fingers. She lay in Kyle's room, under the covers of his bed, her clothes strewn on the dressing table just below her feet. Photographs of his mother who had recently been in an accident and remained in hospital looked down at her from the pastel coloured walls, next to football and soccer awards. _Sportsman of the Year, Most Achieved Young Sportsman, Most Improved Soccer Player, State Football Team Winners... Best Cousin in the Whole, Wide World._ The ribbon and medal that Clary had made him when she was six still hung from a nail just above his mirror, a messy painting scribbled on the bottom of the silk. She remembered how disappointed Jocelyn was when she had thought that Clary was a hopeless artist, instead of just a late learner.

Clary leaned forward and groaned against the sharp pain in her stomach as her alcohol threatened to make a reappearance, and grabbed her phone along with the note from Jace, saying the number on the back of the paper in her mind as she typed it in on her phone.

One ring.

Two.

A third.

"Whoever dares to disturb me at this time of the morning, prepare to die," the voice on the other eld of the line said, adding – after a moment of silence – , "Unless you're a pretty lady, may I add."

"J-Jace?" Clary stuttered incoherently.

"Yes?"

"It-It's Clary. You know, from l-last night?" She choked the last two words of the sentence out and slumped back against the pillow – pulling the covers over her naked body – , looking at her cousin's clock that read 4:30a.m.

"Dear God, it's Ginger! What are you doing awake at this time of the morning, Ginger?"

Clary looked at the note, reading the part that Jace had written about leaving at 2a.m. "Did you seriously just drive home from the party at two in the morning, and fall back to sleep?"

"As opposed to what? Wandering the empty streets for six hours before going to school? You've got to be kidding me. I need my beauty sleep if I want to look as good as I always do," Jace scoffed and Clary rolled her eyes.

"To get to the point _Blondie – " _Clary started before the voice at her ear started to speak again.

"Is this about the dry cleaning bill? Because I'm not going to compromise. Personally, I think it's a fair price," he said.

Clary frowned and let out an exasperated sigh. "What the hell are you talking about? I think the alcohol has gotten to your head."

"Obviously, or I would have been safe at home last night instead of shaking the bed with a certain hot red-head."

Clary screeched. Her mouth moved open and closed like a fish for moments before she was able to speak again. "That was _totally _inappropriate."

"And what we did wasn't?"

"Oh, just shut up!"

"It's called a joke, Ginger," Jace said, traces of amusement still evident in his voice. "Look at the back of the note I left, down the bottom on the back."

Clary's eyes scanned down the paper and came to a sentence of writing scribbled in thick permanent marker.

_For the shirt you ruined last night, it's under your dress. Take it to the dry cleaner, they will charge you $35 at most. If the stain won't come out, you're buying me a new shirt._

"Alright, whatever, I'll get your stupid shirt cleaned! The thing is, you left me without vital information," Clary explained.

"I forgot to write down the address of the dry cleaners, didn't I?"

"Jace, please shut your stupid ass mouth for one second and listen to me. I have no idea what I'm supposed to tell my mom about where I was."

"And?" Jace said.

"And, what did you tell yours?" Clary asked.

"Oh, nothing. They probably didn't even notice I was gone. What about, you had a drink or two, and you didn't want to get pulled over or arrested for being underage, so you decided it was safer to stay at your cousin's. It's not like he's exactly a stranger. Just tell your parents that, Clary."

"My _mom_. Just my mom," the girl corrected quickly, ignoring the fact that if she were to say that, Jocelyn would probably get Kyle in trouble for supplying the drinks, and everyone at the party for downing them. Until she came up with a better alibi, it would have to do.

"Oh," was all Jace said before the line was silent, apart from the sound of him breathing.

"Is that all you wanted?" he finally asked, interrupting the awkward silence.

"Yes, thank you," Clary nodded. She lay there for a few seconds, before frowning and opening her mouth to say, "Jace, do your parents really not notice when you're gone?" Only to be met by the loud beep, signalling the end of a call.

After jumping up from the bed with a little too much enthusiasm for her internal organs to handle, she was dressed in her ripped, broken-beyond-repair dress and dangerously high heels. The girl ran a hand through her tangled red hair and shut her eyes, ignoring the pain that was rising from her waist, through her stomach, up to her mouth, giving herself only a moment to jump move and head towards the bathroom before the drinks of the previous night came back up. She didn't forget the note, slipping it into her bra and picking up the boy's stained shirt with it.

o.O.o

He couldn't take it back. That night. He couldn't give the girl back her virginity. He couldn't take back his care-free attitude to getting girls in bed after her. The feel of her warm breath in his ear as he held her against the door and gripped her thighs, ripping the white fishnets and lace of her dress. It wasn't like he had never enjoyed being with girls that way before, but this was different. Any other time it had been a reel in, toss away thing. Even with Kaelie, as she kept coming back for more, or Aline. They were distractions. But he hadn't needed a distraction at the party, he hadn't chosen her because he was bored and needed a little exciting. He had _wanted _her. He _still _wanted her. To hold her, and kiss her, just like he had the night of the party.

She was probably already taken. He saw the way that the nerd, Simon, looked at her, tripping over his own shoes whenever she smiled at him. She was the cute, geeky artist that still wore children sized clothes and had to stand on her tip toes to reach her locker. He knew the way the guys on the team at high school joked about getting with her, finding out what made her gasp. It was a laugh, watching the slightest thing make her blush and look down at her feet. But they didn't look at her seriously.

Every thought in his head, spiralling around out of control, was still out of his reach. Because as he looked at what he held in his hands, he knew he was screwed. The same small, silver square piece of plastic that he carried around in his wallet.

Untouched.

Unopened.

o.O.o

It was like Clary was on fire. It burned. Everything burned. Her whole body burned like separate matches were roasting inside her skin. Every inch she walked, she gasped. She had been gripping her palms with her nails so hard they were cut and bloody. It felt the same as when she had poured the alcohol down her throat, sending sparks through her mouth. But ten times more agonising than that. The sharp corner of the paper that Jace had left for her dug into the skin just below her jean pocket as she entered the girls changing room at Ravenswood High, earning looks from Kaelie and Aline, and a sympathetic smile from Maia, who was standing at her locker next to the two friends. Out of everyone at the school, she liked Maia the most, apart from Simon Lewis. She accepted her, and stood up for her when Kaelie and Aline pushed her down like tons of bricks being stacked on top of her head. Clary respected her for that, with the same respect she used to have to Aline when they were only children...

"God, I was hoping she wouldn't turn up today," Kaelie hissed to one of her Barbie doll friends, who giggled and nodded.

Clary glared at them under her long eye lashes. She fiddled with her lock for a while before finally reaching up and pulling her P.E. uniform down and starting to change into it, ignoring the group of girls staring at her and laughing and Clary stripped to a midriff singlet and tight black shorts before tugging her uniform on over them.

The door that led to the indoor basketball courts was slammed open and the girls P.E. Instructor, Miss Delamont, ushered them out into the court, waiting as Clary placed her neatly folded jeans and fleece on the bench under her locker.

"We'll be right there, Miss," Kaelie said in her annoying, ear piercing, nasally voice.

Clary was already out of the room and heading towards the hoops when her phone started to vibrate under her clothing, missing the Caller ID name, and then missing Jace's call completely. Missing all twenty four calls, as she ran laps around the court.

o.O.o

"Jesus, Clary, what the hell is this about?" Simon held his hand out to the side as him and the girl walked through the middle of the crowd on their way to get to class, every other student looking at Clary and turning their heads to the side to mutter to their friends.

Clary looked up from her phone after failing to get a hold of Jace. That was the thing. She didn't know. Since the period after gym, the glares that she usually received from Kaelie's group, had extended to the entire year, and the years above. _Slut, whore, prostitute, trophy girl_, the people had been whispered in her ear as they passed.

"Yes, Clarissa, why don't you tell him?" a voice belonging obviously to Aline whispered from in front of her.

The girl stood there, stroking her silky black hair, her hand linked with Kaelie's, whose shoulder was bumping Sebastian Verlac's.

Even looking at him still made Clary want to take a step back and have a cold shower, to forget about him, his touch, his harsh voice and threatening words and violet hands. If he hadn't tried to force himself on Clary repeatedly over the last year, violet and strong against her, maybe they would have still been friends. But you can't take back something like that. And the girl had a feeling Sebastian didn't want to. There was a certain triumph his eyes held when he looked at her. Jocelyn had come so close to filing a restraining order on the boy, only calmed down by Clary begging not to make even more chaos and panic.

"If I knew, I would say, Aline," Clary said quietly. She tried to push past the three students, but they formed a solid wall against her.

"Then explain this," Kaelie giggled and shook her head, her fake blonde hair flying in different directions around her, as she handed Clary a familiar piece of yellow note paper. The same piece that had been lying on the bed that morning at 4a.m., but instead of just ending with '_Sex Buddy_', there was a line under that. Just one word. But the wrong one. Sebastian's name.

_No, no, no_, Clary groaned inwardly as her throat closed up to stop her from speaking. Just like that, her stomach was knotting again, and butterflies were being wrapped in cocoons, breaking out and making smaller butterflies, inside her. She looked to Sebastian in help, but all he did was a simple shrug, like he couldn't care less.

"I'm sorry, Clary, but they found it in your jeans. The girls said if no one owned up, they'd make someone up and tell everyone. I couldn't let someone else get the blame, so I owned up," he said smoothly, smiling an innocent smile in her direction.

Simon took a sudden breath and Clary felt his tense beside her. The muscles around his mouth jumped and his hands were in tight fists, the blood being cut off from his finger.

"But – " Clary's voice was cut off by Kaelie towering over her, smiling wickedly.

"Soon, Clarissa Fray, this school will know what a slut you really are. You... _and _your sex buddy."

o.O.o

Even after several private attempts from Sebastian, she hadn't admitted to him who the boy really was that had taken her that night in her sexy underwear and lace dress. The one that had slammed her up against a wall and gripped at her hips. All he knew, was that it wasn't him.

"I don't believe it for a second," Simon announced as he sat in the front passenger seat of Clary's beaten up BMW hatchback, tossing grape after grape up in the air and attempting to catch them in his mouth.

"First of all, stop doing that. Soon, you are actually going to catch one, and then you will choke on it," Clary warned. "And secondly, I should hope not! You know me well enough to know I wouldn't do something like _that _with _him._"

"I know," Simon shrugged. "I mean, you're far too innocent and pure to let someone get in your pants."

Holding the steering wheel with one hand, Clary used her other to hit Simon lightly on his shoulder, faking a laugh to hide how false the sentence was that her friend had just said. "Shut up," she said, slowing down to a gravel driveway that led to Simon's house.

"You sure you don't want to come in? Mom's making her famous turkey tonight," Simon grinned.

"Is it Thanksgiving already? God, time went by fast," she joked.

"Very funny, Fray."

"Sorry, Si," Clary said seriously. "I... Uh... I need to..." _Go and call Jace to see what was so important he had to call me twenty four times. _"Finish my science homework, it's due soon and I can't get behind."

Her friend shrugged, just about to turn before looking back at her. "Hey, Clare?" he said slowly.

"Yeah, Si?"

"You're a girl, right?"

She choked a laugh and regretted it soon after as her stomach began to twist into knots again. "Last time I checked, yes."

"So, you know what girls like. You know, what they look for in a guy."

"And you're asking me this, why?" Clary said.

"Well, just out of curiosity. If I was to ask a girl out, you know. What do girls want in a boyfriend?"

"Well, I don't know what most girls want, but if it was me, I'd want a guy with a good sense of humour, someone who liked the same stuff as me, made me laugh and smile, someone I could be myself around and doesn't compare me to girls like Kaelie and Aline. You know, a guy who makes me feel good about myself."

Simon hurried to type down what she said on his phone, getting her to repeat it a few times so he could get it all down. "Humour, be yourself, same stuff, laughing and smiling, good things, good about yourself," he muttered and then turned to look at his friend. "Thanks, Clary."

"I hope it helps," she smiled.

"Yeah," he whispered. "Yeah, me too."

o.O.o

Clary leaned over the bathroom sink, rocking back and forth, her eyes shut. In her head she could still hear the conversation that she and Jace had just had at the park. She didn't even know how she'd done it. It was certain that she'd run home afterwards in a record about of time. Every word, she was going over. Every glance. Every warning.

"_Do you never answer your phone, or was today just a one-time thing?" Jace had hissed as he pulled her to sit down on the bench that faced the children's playground. He'd tugged his jacket tighter around him from the sudden wind but his lips were still a purple colour and he still had shivered from the cold._

"_I was in P.E." Clary had replied, frowning. "What's so important that we had to meet here?" she said through her chattering teeth. She quickly handed him a blue paper bag with his name scribbled onto it and pictures of trees and children playing were drawn around it. "It's your shirt. A new one. The stain wouldn't come out. Also, your previous one didn't have a size on it, so I just had to guess."_

"_You didn't have to, really. I was just joking," the boy said quietly, looking at her as she shivered and huddled herself into the small jacket she had on."Are you cold?" He reached to take his jacket off, but Clary had just pushed his hands back down._

"_Not as cold as you look to be."_

"_Here, have the jacket," Jace urged, silently begging her to let him be nice before he had to break the news. _

"_No."_

"_Dammit, can't you at least let me be a gentleman before I say what I have to say, Ginger?" he said, exasperated._

_Clary sent him a pointed look. "Did you hear all the rumours that are going through Ravenswood? They think _Sebastian's _the one I slept with. God," she put her face in her hands and sighed. __"Everyone thinks I'm a whore. He told everyone that I... I..." she continued to choke on her words and a tear drop fell from her one of her eyes into her hands._

"_What did they say?" Jace had asked gently, one of his hands on her shoulder, the other still holding his jacket tightly._

"_That I begged him. That I _paid _him," she gasped, frantically trying to wipe away the tears that were now beginning to fall more fluidly down onto her palms. _

"_Why on Earth would Sebastian _want _people to know it was him?" Jace frowned. _

_Clary sighed and shook her head, bringing her gloved hands to her cheeks. "It's a long story."_

"_Trust me," the boy let out a small laugh, "I'm not rushing home."_

"_You really want to know, or are you just asking to be nice? Because you seem to be doing an awful lot of that."_

"_Of what?"_

"_Being nice."_

_Jace smiled and moved around on the bench seat once more. "Tell me, please?"_

"_Well, first you have to swear on your life that you won't tell anyone," she held up her little finger and bit back a grin and Jace groaned and linked in pinkie through hers. "Okay, well last year, I was kind of having a hard time. My parents were getting a divorce, my Aunt and Kyle's mother got hit by a car and went into a comba. And Sebastian was there for me, the whole time. His mom and mine were best friends, so he was with me a lot. With him was the only time I smiled, and then," she took a deep breathe and closed her eyes, "he tried to ask me out, and I got angry at him for expecting me to say yes when so much was going on for my family. He respected me for a little while and stayed away, but once all the family drama passed, he decided he'd try again. When I kept refusing, he got angrier and angrier. One day at one of Kyle's famous parties, he tried to drug me by putting something in my drink and when that didn't work, he pushed me into a private corner, and... he, he tried to..."_

_Jace inhaled a sharp breath. "Jesus, Clary. I'm so sorry," he knew it wasn't enough, but there was nothing else he could think to say. He scoffed to himself. The centre of attention, up himself, high school jock; speechless. _

"_Since then, I haven't gone to any party where he was bound to be."_

"_But, last night, you did?"  
_

"_Kyle had just gotten home from overseas, you know?" the girl explained. I missed him, so I was just hoping that Sebastian wouldn't be there."_

"_But he was," Jace said slowly._

_Clary nodded and looked up at the boy with sad eyes. "That's why I agreed to dance with you. I saw him coming my way, looking at me like he was planning something, so I guessed that he'd leave me alone if I was with you."_

_Jace didn't speak for a minute, but then slowly started nodding. "Ah, so we have him to thank for what went down in your cousins bed."_

_Clary couldn't help the giggle that came out of her mouth, and couldn't stop as it slowly turned to a painful sob. "I'm so sorry."_

_Jace shook his head, his brow creased. "Don't be. It's not your fault. God, how did they find out?"_

"_The note you left me, Sebastian wrote his name at the bottom."_

"_The note I specifically told you to rip up?" he sighed._

_Clary nodded._

"_Well, maybe it is partially your fault, then," Jace shrugged and leaned back on the outdoor wooden chair._

_Clary snorted and covered her mouth, the blood rushing to her cheeks._

"_Ah, that got some colour into your face," Jace chuckled._

_They laughed together for a moment, before it faded down and Clary was left looking into Jace's golden eyes that were focused of a cloud in the distance._

"_Funny shapes clouds make, huh?" Clary smiled a half-smile and pointed to one right above their heads. "See, that one looks like a pig."_

"_Nah," Jace shook his head and grinned at Clary. "It looks more like Kaelie."_

_Clary laughed and elbowed him gently, her eyes settling back on him. "We could go cloud watching," she said quietly, letting her face fall and Jace shook him head and fidgeted in his seat. "I mean, it was just an idea! Not like, together, but for fun, I meant. You know, no big deal. But whatever, it's stupid, anyway."_

"_It isn't that, Clary."_

"_Then... what?"_

"_Just... God," Jace sighed and ran a hand through his golden hair. "Once I say what I want to say, you probably won't want to go 'cloud watching' with me."_

_Clary frowned and pulled her knees up to her chest, ignoring the stabbing pain that went through her chest and stomach one more time. _

"_It's just, I'm always so careful, when it comes to doing... _stuff... _with girls. And, I always remember," he started hesitantly._

"_Jace," Clary laughed and shook her head. "What the hell are you on about?"_

"_Do you remember, all of that night?"_

"_Not exactly, I remember a few parts, but not everything. Why?"_

_Jace looked at her, moving his jaw from side to side and taking breathes of cold air. "So, you don't remember if we, you know, used... protection? Against..."_

_Clary, from her legs being tucked under her chin, bolted so fast to standing position that she tilted over in dizziness as another episode of sickness washed over her that she quickly swallowed away._

Just the hangover, _she told herself over and over again. _Just the hangover.

"God, please let it be the hangover," Clary begged as she finished remembering. "Please, please, please."

And just like that, everything came over her. Years with Jocelyn, watching boys who looked like they hadn't been cared for in years, walking past with dreadlocks in their hair, and Clary promising her mom that she would never have a baby to a boy like that. Promising never to become pregnant or be stupid enough to have a baby in high school. Never to even think about it until she was married. They would look at young girls with rounded stomachs going past, and Jocelyn would shake her head at them and say it was their fault just as much as the daddy's. Clary's father would always say that if she were to ever become pregnant before she was twenty one years old, the father would end up in hospital in a comba with two broken legs and no man parts.

Her stomach lurched forward, and she leant over the sink once more as she threw up the only part of her lunch left in her system, as she figured out what to do.

Pregnancy test, was not an option this early on. According to the nurse's that came to talk to the girls at Ravenswood the year before, it wouldn't show on a pregnancy test until a bit later. So, Clary's easiest option was already gone.

The only other thing, was a blood test, which was by far not an easy one for Clary. Not just being registered at the doctors, but the sight of a needle would probably make her food make a reappearance again. Was there any other choice though? No.

She grabbed her car keys just as her phone beeped and a message from the very same number she had found twenty four missed calls on, popped up.

_What are you going to do? Made a decision? - Jace _

Clary sighed and hesistated before her fingers started moving over the buttons.

_**I didn't realise you wanted to be involved, Secret Sex Buddy? - Clary **_

A few seconds, and there was already a reply, buzzing around on the screen.

_Trust me, I don't, but I was wondering. - Jace_

In a moment after reading the first four words, her face fell. Of course, he didn't care. And it was her first time, anyway. The chances of becoming... Well, they were very low, Clary reassured herself. _Figures, _she thought. _My first time having sex, and I can't even remember half of it. Smart one, Fray. _

_**I'm going to have a blood test. Don't worry, I won't leave your name.**_

_Call me with what happens? - J _

_**Only if it's worth calling about. **_

And she signed her name at the end.

o.O.o

The doctor's room was cold. The kind of cold that made you want to crawl up in a ball and jump into lava, kind of cold. But it was more the smell that made Clary want to run from the doctors room as far as possible. Or really, the lack of smell. That, and the over-friendliness of her doctor, Halina Jansen. It was as if in the lady's eyes, Clary was still the five year old girl with a stuck up nose and pouty lower lip that ran all the way from home to Halina when she bruised her finger. Really, she felt like family. A very annoying, very exagerated, family member. The last time Clary remembered coming in here was two months ago, after being hit in a game of volley ball. This was a bit of a different scenario, though, that having tissue bruising in your cheek.

"So, Darl, why don't you start from the beginning," Dr Jansen looked at her, leaning forward with a big grin on her face, showing her whitened teeth and dropping so her fake breats were for her to see a bit too much of. Why she had become a doctor, Clary couldn't tell. And the other thing the girl hated about Halina, was her habit was raise one eyebrow at a time, a thing Clary just couldn't do.

_I swear if she doesn't wipe that huge grin off her face... _Clary said to herself. So instead, she decided to wipe it off for her. "I think I'm pregnant," she said bluntly, staring motionlessly into the doctors eyes and biting back a smile her giant smile turned in to an _O _shape.

"Oh, baby doll," the doctor said in a soothing voice, making Clary cringe as she placed a hand on the girl's shoulder. "What happened?"

So temped to tell her the whole truth, from getting drunk to taking a boy upstairs and placing him on the bed, the only thing that stopped her was that _if _or _when _she found out she was pregnant, and her mother found out, she didn't want to story to come out that way. Clary shut her eyes. _Shit, my mom_. "Well, me and my... _boyfriend_," she thought that was safer than saying someone she hadn't even spoken to before, "we were just at a party," she shrugged. "And then, we got carried away, dancing, we were so oblivious to everything, and we made it somehow to a room, and then... I don't even know how to say this! God, it's so embarrassing," Clary faked a strangled sob and covered her eyes with her hands.

"Oh, sweetie," Halina gasped and pulled her into a tight hug, making Clary inhale the sickening sweet smell of her strawberry perfume.

"So," Clary gagged as the doctor slowly let go of her iron tight grip on her. "I was wondering if we could go for a blood test, but I can't let anyone now, Halina. If my mom finds out – "

Halina shook her head furiously. "Oh, of course not! Don't worry, the same thing happened to me when I was a little girl like you," _a long time ago, _Clary thought. "But, it was just a false alarm. I have a question first though, I always ask this when someone comes in with your situation..."

"Anything," Clary said quickly, feeling a sudden urge to get out of this place as soon as possible.

"Was this your first sexual interaction, of any kind? Or have you, you know, done it bef – "

"No, no," Clary cut her off quickly. "This was my first time. I know it's unlikely, but I just wanted to check."

"As you should, dear. Now, do we need to go over protection before the blood test?"

Clary let out a high pitched sqeak. _Hell no, _she thought. "I've learnt my lesson, don't worry."

"But you _do _know, how to, you know, slip one on, if the situation comes."

_I'm the girl! Why would I need to know? _But Clary nodded anyway, trying to move away from the memories of the lessons at high school.

"Well, I'll just check that the room's empty, so wait here, and I'll be back," the doctor slipped out of the room and Clary let herself slump down in the seat, her heart pounding in her ears.

"Shit," she whispered again and again, as she waited to be taken in, dreading the moment where the blood would go off to be tested, just as much as she dreaded the moment she got the results back.

o.O.o

Seventeen hours. It had been seventeen hours since they had taken her blood and told her they would get back to her the next day. She counted the seconds, the minutes, as she lay on her messed up bed, staring at the clock's hands that ticket slowly passed the numbers. Clary had rejected dinner from her mother and faked a sickness when Simon had invited her to have a gaming night at his place. She was rejecting calls from Kyle, and everytime her phone vibrated she would stiffen, her face falling when she saw the number was not from the hospital.

Lucky it was the weekend, of she would have had to face another day of school, that she now dreaded even more.

Finally, there was another call, and Clary's whole body was filled with knots as she looked to the screen. It wasn't blocked, or the doctors, or a number that was in her phone, or Jace's, but she knew it from somewhere. She used to call it when she was hurt and needed a bandaid. Halina Jansen.

"Halina?" she croaked out and shot upright in her bed, making the apple seeds she had been fiddling with go everywhere.

"Oh, Clary, I was hoping you'd answer. I didn't want to call using the doctor's phone, incase your mom looked at the bill and saw the number, you know, like she used to," Halina replied. She sounded as if she'd just been for a sprint, out of breath and tired.

"I remembered calling it when I was younger."

"Thought you might, baby doll. Can I ask a question?"

"Before or after the results?" Clary asked cautiously, her hand shaking as she held the phone against her ear.

"Before," Halina said quickly. "Clary, have you thought about what you would do if the tests are positive?"

Clary frowned. Of course she hadn't. Between the stress of trying to find out in the first place if there was a possibility, and trying to avoid suspicion from anyone else, she hadn't had time to think. At all. The only thing she was sure of, was that she didn't want a baby. And then she realised something. That if she did become pregnant, and the students at school found out, they would think it was Sebastian. Everyone would be spreading rumours that it was _Sebastian _who was the father, and Clary wasn't sure Jace would own up to it.

_Please say I don't have to worry, _Clary begged silently as she swallowed and opened her mouth to speak. "No, not even a bit. I haven't had much time to think."

"I understand, sweetie. I know exactly how you feel, but I think you might have to, Hun."

She was paralysed, from head to toe. Because she knew what the doctor meant. It wasn't hard to catch on. The meaning was intended in the words and the sympathy in her voice. There was no voice on the other end, except for Halina apologising profusely over and over again, promising not to say a word. But it didn't matter. Nothing mattered. Not in that instant when the truth came to her.

The phone dropped, Clary shut her eyes, and she sank as far down into the bed as she could, before a vibration on the floor told her that a message had just been sent to her and from the ringtone, she knew it was Jace. She didn't even look at it for minutes, and when she did all she could do was let a tear slip from the corner of her eye. It wasn't the hangover that was making her sick, they didn't last two days from the ammount she drank. The knots weren't from her little friend being about to arrive.

_God, please tell me you have the results, Clary? - Jace, a.k.a: Sex Buddy No Longer_

So she responded the only way she could, to take his worry away, even if it was a lie.

_**It was negative. I'm not pregnant. Please don't mention this to anyone. - Clary **_

And it only took a second for the boy to respond.

_Thank God. - J _

_**Well, there's the first official chapter for you (: I hope you enjoyed it! So, moving onto a completely different subject, my other new story! Yes, I'm handling two at a time. It's called 'Darker Blood' and so far, there are not many reviews, but I personally think I'm writing about a very different and interesting topic in that story, so I would appreciate it if you could read it and review? Otherwise I won't continue it ): **_

_**So, review! I know you want to ;) Hate, love, can't stand it. Let me know.**_

_**Until next time fellow Jace lovers,**_

_**SecretAngelBlood**_

_**** Disclaimer: I do not own the Mortal Instruments or its characters. All rights belong to Cassandra Clare, unfortunately** **_


	3. Hockey Sticks and Baby Kicks

_Back once, forward. Almost hit the puck and bring it back again. One last time. Finally swing it_ _hard towards the right shoulder, and... _WHAM! Clary's hockey stick hit the ball with force and went straight through the legs of the scarecrow goal keeper, making a clinging, denting sound when it hit the back of the metal stand. Even after only fourteen days, she could already feel the difference in her strength. Sure, her scoring technique still may look flawless, but the girl could notice how the puck didn't meet the ball as loudly. She could notice the difference in speed as the ball slid over the concrete patch in her backyard in into the net. It was so much more difficult to get her angles and body position right. And more than that, it hurt inside. Carrying the ball back as high as her shoulder hurt her elbows and leaning over to hit the ball made her stomach feel as if it was on fire. Sometimes, only for a second or so, Clary wished she could hit the baby with a hockey stick. She felt awful for thinking it, even though she didn't even like the baby. Somehow her own experience made hating the creature inside her a little harder. Clary remembered being little and hearing discussions between her mom and her father that she wasn't meant to. "Maybe you should have kicked her a little bit harder!", "Don't you wish we'd gone to an adoption agency in the beginning? She's far too much of a nuissance now, no one would ever even consider taking the little brat." She knew the feeling of being unloved, and she didn't want that for anyone else in the world. So she did her best. Every morning when she woke up in the pitch black to make her way to the toilet and puke her guts out, she'd tell herself how it wasn't the baby's fault.

"A bit harder with another person inside of you pulling on your gag reflexes, isn't it?"

Clary jumped and tripped backwards on the concrete. For a moment she was falling and her red hair was in her eyes so that she couldn't see anything, the next warm, familiar arms were wrapped around her and pushing her upright again. She spun around and gasped. Clary probably would have fallen again, but Kyle's arms were holding her tightly and she didn't even become unbalanced.

"Kyle!" She plastered a smile onto her face as best she could.

"Don't, Clare," he sighed and ran a hand through his dark hair. "What have you being saying to your mum about why you haven't been at school? I bet she doesn't know the real reason is that you're carrying another person around inside of you."

For a couple of weeks, Clary had found excuses to tell her mother. Some of them were lame, like having a sore throat, or maybe a bit of a cough, but it probably wouldn't have mattered if she'd told Jocelyn that she had just decided not to go to school. It wasn't like her mother cared. It had been bad after her dad left, but now it was worse than Clary could have imagined. She was pretty much a heartless witch.

"No," she admitted sheepishly before kicking into defense mode. "But do you really think I'd still be welcome to live at home if she did? One second I'd be explaining what happened and the next thing I know I would probably being driven straight to the Guinacologist for an abortion." There was no point playing dumb with Kyle like she didn't know what he was talking about. Her big cousin had always been able to see right through her, a thing that not many people were able to do.

"And you don't think an abortion may be the smart decision?"

"I don't know," the girl whispered, wrapping her arms around herself and looking down at the ground so that Kyle wouldn't see the tears starting to fall down her cheeks like small crystals. "It's just so hard to think about. Every single time I try to, my mind gets clogged up and confused. I'm so scared."

It was the most comforting, delightful feeling that Clary had felt in weeks when Kyle reached out and pulled her gently into a protective hug. "I know you are, Clare Bear. I know you are," he murmered while stroking her hair softly.

"How did you find out?"

"Jace told me about the night of the party after I heard what Sebastian was telling everyone, how he's going around saying that the note was from him. I believed it when he showed me your text saying it was just a false alarm, but seeing you know... I can tell it's everything but that. First time sex doesn't make you look like this, but pregnancy does," Kyle explained.

"So I guess that answers my question to if he'd admitted it wasn't him yet?"

"Yep, he's actually doing the opposite – bragging about it."

Clary made a choking noise.

"Simon's been asking about you, he says you've been dodging all his calls and when he comes by to see you, no one answers the door. He's really worried about you, Clary. So am I," Kyle said, resting his chin on the top of Clary's head.

"It would be better if you were a Junior instead of a Senior," Clary said, her voice muffled as she spoke into Kyle's elbow. "My only friend in my year is Simon. And Maia, but we can never hang out, she's with Aline and all of them." It was true, school still would have been horrible, but if Kyle was there for her, to stand up for her, it at least would have been bearable.

"You know you can always come and hang out with my friends for lunch," Kyle said that, but Clary wasn't convinced that his friends, Jace in particular, would be very happy about that. A junior sitting with the Seniors was bad enough, without the junior being a geeky nobody.

It was Kyle who pulled back first and his face was grim and solemn.

"Jace is my best friend, Clary," he stood there studying her. "He needs to know. He has a _rite _to know. It's his child your carrying. No matter how much you wish that _thing,_" he gestured to her stomach in digust, "would just go away at the blink of an eye, it's not going to. You know that more that anyone." Clary did, she'd tried voodoo, ghost whispering, medieval curses, the lot. "It's going to grow, and grow, and grow, and grow, until your the size of ten watermelons stuck together. Sooner or later, he'll notice. Everyone will." Clary scoffed. "This is serious, Clarissa! In case you haven't noticed, you're smaller than most Juniors. Hell, you're smaller than most middle schoolers. Add all of that extra weight and pressure into your tiny body, who knows if you'll even make it to giving birth? This is _dangerous_. And I know how many decisions you have infront of you, and I will be there for you every step of the way," he hesitated.

"But..." Clary pushed him to continue.

"_But_, I won't let you make them without him. Jace may act like a complete ass, but he's a good person."

There was silence. In the trees the birds sang their happy songs and all Clary wanted to do was get her thinnest, sharpest paint brushes and shoot them at those stupid little animals. _Is this what pregnancy does to you? _She thought in horror. _Am I going to be an angry bitch who goes around killing innocent animals?_

Her next words were bland, but got to the point in less than one sentence. "Get out."

Kyle stepped forward but Clary pushed him back. "Clare B - "

"I said _get out_."

This time, he backed away with no argument. But not before slipping a small, yellow slip of paper into her hand. "It's Jace's number," he explained before she could question him.

She ripped it in to quarters and sprinkled it on to the ground. "I already have it."

"He has a new one now, he had to change it because of the note going around. Too many prank callers, thinking it was Sebastian."

She stood frozen looking at the ground with a stubborn look on her face until she heard the gate shut closed. When she looked up, her eyes welling up with tears once again, Kyle was gone and so was all her will power. The last five days, she hadn't cried one single time. But after the first encounter with a human in a week – apart from her mother, who Clary wasn't sure that she'd classify as a human in the first place – she couldn't hold out any longer. There was only enough time for her to bend her knees and put her arms out in front of her before she fell to the ground in a fountain of salty tears.

Next to her lay the four pieces of paper with a jumble of numbers on them. It was easy for Clary to put them back in order, but one number she wasn't sure if it was a six or an eight. Reaching out to clasp her Blackberry, she tried the first.

Four rings and then straight to the answer machine. "You've reached Jace. I know how devastated you must be to miss me, but leave a message and I'll try to ease your agony."

"Jace, it's Clary... Look, I know you think we shouldn't keep in contact or anything, and I would be in total angreeance, but - "

The other line was picked up. "Ginger!" the voice on the other end sounded amused and care free. _Oh, how I wish it could stay like that_, Clary sighed.

"Yeah, Blondie, we need to talk. And I don't mean just 'have a chat'," she looked at the time on her watch and let out a frustrated groan. Her mother would be home in twenty minutes, there was no way Jace could have come and gone my then. "Can you meet me at Kyle's house in ten minutes?"

"Well, I'm actually supposed to be having a hair appointment at 5, and then I was scheduled in for a facial..."

Clary let out an exasperated sigh. Was he always this sarcastic and annoying? Wait, she already knew the answer: Yes. "See you in ten."

And she hung up.

It was easy math. Clary had ten minutes to get to Kyle's. To walk there took seven at a fast pace, to walk there in her unhealthy, pregnant condition, it would take at least twelve. It was a guess, considering Clary hadn't had to do it in her pregnant state before. It was a rush to chuck the loosest item of clothing she had: a gorgeous white sundress with spaghetti straps and a frilled layer at the top. It really wasn't the best thing to wear; Clary knew Jace would immediately think she was dressing up for him. But it was the loosest thing she had to wear. It felt like she was carrying a buffalo in her stomach, and even though no one could see the bump, she felt it like a bitch. Clary had enough time to brush on some chapstick, mascara and foundation. Even with the makeup, it didn't make her look good. Sure, she looked better. But she was still obviously ill.

The girl had no idea what to say to Kyle when she turned up after the argument only minutes ago. Was is her responsibility to apologise? She sucked at apologies. To her, apologies were what people said when they'd done something wrong. In her mind, the only wrong thing she'd done was have sex with Jace in the first place.

After taking the stairs, she closed the front door and stuck up a note that said '_**GONE TO KYLE'S FOR DINNER. DON'T WAIT UP**_**' **She knew her mom wouldn't anyway, though.

It was a direct line from Clary's house to her cousin's. There were no corners to turn, she just continued walking for exactly thirteen minutes, turned into a driveway that led her to the front door of Kyle's million dollar house. She pressed the door bell and it opened just as she was having second thoughts.

It was obvious from Kyle's expression that he wasn't expecting her to have turned up begging for mercy so soon. He didn't look exactly surprised when he looked at her, more puzzled. He knew it wasn't like Clary to be the one to apologise first. Or _ever_, for a matter of fact.

"Shut up, I'm not saying sorry, so don't ask me to. I'm not saying you're right about everything, but you were right about the fact that Jace is going to notice sooner or later, and I don't want him to hear from a rumour or a photo of me fat, I need to tell him. I suppose he deserves that at least," she admitted, twiddling with her thumbs and looking at Kyle from under her long lashes with puppy dog eyes. "Can I please just come in?"

He looked at her expressionless and for a moment she was thinking, _Shit, I've really blown it. _Before thinking about the pun that had just gone on in her mind. She shook her head to get rid of the thought. Finally, that loveable, warm smile that Kyle only ever showed to her appeared. The older boy stepped out of the way and welcomed his cousin into the grand foyer, all marble floor and expensive statues.

"Where's Jace?"

Kyle scoffed. "Fashionably late, as ususal."

Clary had expected Jace to be here waiting impatiently, since she was already three minutes late.

"Mom's going to be home soon. And don't get me wrong, she loves you, but I don't think she wants to be on the same level of the house as you when the news is broken," Kyle sighed. "As long as you promise to use my bedroom sensibly this time, you can talk with Jace in there. Just no funny business."

The last thing on Clary's mind was 'funny business' with Jace. After the whole Sex Buddy scandal and unexpected pregnancy, she wasn't really in the mood to do 'funny business' with anyone, ever again.

She showed herself up to Kyle's bedroom with her cousin following behind.

"Jesus woman, can't you walk any faster?" Kyle complained as Clary took her time to walk up the stairs.

"Don't talk to me like that, I'm disabled."

She was about to step into the bedroom at the far end of the hall before saving herself from tripping over a whole pile of bed sheets and blankets that were built in a mountain at the door. She gave Kyle a questioning look.

He simply shrugged. "I didn't particularly fancy sleeping in a pool of Jace jizz."

Clary groaned and felt herself turning the brightest of reds. "Forget I even asked."

"Techincally, you didn't."

"Smartass," she muttered under her breath.

"Watch it, Cuz. My house, my rules; You start calling me names and you're out."

She plopped onto Kyle's bed and looked at him, confused. _What happens now? _

"I guess I'll just..." her cousin looked at the floor awkwardly. "I'll be downstairs."

The bedroom door closed and Clary just sat on the bed, unsure of what to do. She changed positions so her legs were crossed, and then so she was lying down, and then she decided altogether that maybe the bed were 'it' had created, wasn't the best place to tell Jace about 'it', so she moved herself into Kyle's grandma style rocking chair _next _to the bed. She threw one of his football's up and down in the air but decided to stop when it crashed into a drawing that Clary had made for Kyle in second grade.

There were footsteps, and every time another step was made towards the door, the more Clary was less opposed to the idea of jumping out the window. Or maybe hiding under the bed was a safer option. Either way, it didn't matter, because the door was already opened and Jace had already seen her.

"Ginger!" he looked at her with an amused and astonished expression. "I was starting to think you were dead."

That's what he said, but Clary didn't hear it. She couldn't hear anything but the butterflies in her stomach making room for the baby that was moving around, and her heartbeat that was pounding in her ears.

"Jace, here," she stood up and gestured to the rocking chair. "You're gonna need to sit down for this."

_Alright, alright, I know it wasn't a real chapter. Nothing that exciting happened, but it was a fill in. Sorry guys, but it had to be done. The real fun will come in the next chapter, if you can call what's going to happen 'fun.' _

_So help me out please, and lets reach 50 reviews? That isn't so hard. Think about it: I work my butt off for you to keep you happy, and you take 30 seconds out of your life to review. I like that deal, huh? ;)_

_PM me anytime, I always love a good talk with my readers :)_


	4. Easy P

"Sorry, Ginger, can you repeat that? I thought you just told me that you were pregnant."

Clary inhaled a breath and forced her gaze towards him. Her jaw was tense, her breathed jagged. Her cracked, bitten fingernails scratched at her palms. This was the response she was dreading. More than a furious outburst or Jace falling down and crying. It would have been better for him to sit in the rocking chair speechless, than believe she was joking. As Clary swallowed, it was like icicles were playing a game of pinball in her throat. Her lip started quivering and she had to turn away as two tears raced down her face.

There was a slam as Jace's wrist hit the arm rest and then a string of curse words that were being muttered. "Tell me what to say, Clary. Because I have no god damned idea what to tell you right now."

She spun around to look him the eyes. All her embarrassment and guilt was gone, being replaced by bubbles of lava that were popping in her chest. "I want you to tell me what you're feeling right now," the girl said through gritted teeth. "I don't want to put words in your mouth, Jace. Don't tell me some crap story about how it's your fault or how you're so sorry for me, I don't care. I want to know what's popping in to your mind this moment."

The golden haired boy looked at her in astonishment and stood up. His foot moved to take a step towards Clary, but she jumped back and winced. "I'm feeling the default emotions that one normally does when a girl that they barely know announces that they are carrying something that they are partly responsible for creating."

"And what emotions are they?"

"Surprise, shock, guilt, _surprise_," he ran a calloused hand through his hair and inhaled a sharp breath. "I have no fu – _freaking _idea what I'm supposed to do about this. Are... are you really sure?"

"No, in fact I'm here before I've even taken a blood test on the off chance that I am actually carrying something inside my stomach. It's not like I've bought every single pregnancy test from the pharmacy," Clary said dryly. "Of course I'm sure, Jace! And I know this isn't the best situation - "

"The _best situation_? Clary, I'm seventeen years old. You're sixteen!"

"Fifteen," Clary corrected quickly.

Jace through his hands up in the air. "Oh, and that makes it so much better. The point is, I never even thought I wanted a kid in twenty years time. I planned on going on 'The Bachelor' to find the ultimate hot women and then dump the winning girl's ass after I got tired of her," he turned his voice down to a quiet, deathly calm tone. "Maybe it will get better. Maybe it will stop breathing or you'll have a miscar..." he couldn't bring himself to say the word. "Then it will all be gone. Or maybe, you should get rid of it yourself, just in case it doesn't do it by itself."

Clary felt all the muscles in her body jump at the suggestion. Was he seriously suggesting an abortion? Yes, of course he was. This was, after all, Jace Wayland she was talking to. He had a career in any department he wanted, with his good looks, athleticism, charm, humour. And also, he didn't know one thing about Clary's upbringing. "You cannot be serious."

"It would get rid of the entire problem, wouldn't it?" Jace asked in a you're-a-total-imbecile tone.

"This," Clary gestured to her stomach. "Is a living thing, Jace! My entire life, I've heard my mother on the phone to her acquaintances complaining about how she didn't get rid of me when she had the chance. I'm not – _will not –_ do that."

Silence hung in the room like a dark rain cloud after that. Clary's legs were aching from standing up through the whole argument, but Jace had already dropped back down into Kyle's bed side chair and there was no way she was sitting on the bed stripped of any sheets or blankets after what had gone down on it. _Embrace the pain, Clarissa, giving birth is going to be a million times harder_, and in that moment, it became obvious to Clary what she had just said. Even if it was only to herself, she'd made a decision without knowing that she'd made it. _Giving birth is going to be a million times harder_. She hadn't said, '_If _I give birth," it have been a definite.

The next words belonged to Jace. "You lied to me."

Clary looked at him in complete surprise. "Excuse me?"

"You're text; it said that it had been a false alarm. For over a week now, you've kept me thinking there was nothing to worry about, while you've probably been at home puking your guts out. Why didn't you tell me when you found out?"

"Because I was scared."

"And you think I'm not?! At least if I'd known, you could have talked to me. Does anyone else know?"

Clary shook her head. "Just Kyle, and I didn't even tell him. He figured it out."

"Jesus, I don't even know your last name!" Jace exclaimed.

"Fray," Clary informed him quickly, even though she knew he hadn't actually _asked _what her last name was.

All of a sudden, a tsunami of nausea came crashing down on Clary. Her head started to spin and her stomach started to swirl into a whirlpool. She had to grip the knob at the end of the bed frame to stop herself from falling to the ground. Jace was next to her in a second. He put an arm awkwardly over her back and bent down.

"Don't get to happy, I'm not having a miscarriage," Clary spat out wryly. "It happens all the time, I just need to..." another wave washed into her body and in a millisecond she was hurdling into Kyle's en suit. Both the tiolet lid and ring was up, a total annoying guy habit, and the only reason she didn't start ranting to Kyle about how he will never get a respectable girlfriend if he keeps that up, was because she started throwing up the only thing she'd eaten in twenty-four hours, a ham and cucumber sandwhich.

There was a loud banging on the door and the handled tried turning. Luckily, Clary had flicked the lock. "Clary, what's going on? Are you alright?"

The sick feeling that had flooded her body was starting to evaporate enough for the girl to open the door and step out. "Can I ask you something?" she said.

Jace nodded and leaned in. Clary pushed him back and picked up her hand bag from next to the door that led from Kyle's bedroom to the long hall way. "Why do they call it 'morning sickness', when it hits you every damned moment of the day?"

Jace frowned and his mouth moved up and down like a goldfish. He really did look puzzled. Finally, when words started to form in his mouth, Clary put a hand up to silence him.

"I don't actually want an answer, Pretty Boy," she sighed. "I have to get home, my mom's probably starting to freak out that I'm not there." It was the biggest lie she'd probably ever told in her life – apart from when someone had asked her if Kaelie was a virgin and Clary had said no. Those were the good days when she'd been dying to be part of their posse – but, she needed an excuse to get home. She couldn't stand being in the same room with Jace for so long, and all she wanted to do was lie down and not have to think. Which, honestly, was pretty much what she'd been doing all week.

Even Jace raised a slender eyebrow at this. _Damn, I wish I could do that_, Clary thought enviously. "Is this the same mother that wished she'd gotten rid of you when she'd had the chance?"

Because Clary couldn't raise on eyebrow, she raised both. "You actually heard me say that?"

"Of course I did," Jace put on a face of mock hurt.

"Well, I'm sorry, but it's always seemed to me as if you don't pay any attention to what anyone has to say."

"And why on Earth would you think that?"

"I see you at lunch, Kaelie is yapping away to you and you are looking around as if you don't even hear her."

"That's because Kaelie has never once in her life said anything with even an inch of depth," Jace said.

They both stood there and laughed at how true that was before Clary's smile dropped, followed by Jace's.

"Well, I'm not letting you walk," Jace announced in a proud tone. He held out a graceful hand to escort Clary down the stairs. She slapped it.

"I'm not actually disabled, I think I can walk a few blocks."

"I know you could," Jace shrugged, refusing to put his hand down. "But I'm not going to let you."

Clary let out an exaperated breath. "Are you always this stubborn?" She put a finger to his lips for a second automatically. "Wait, don't answer that. I already know the answer."

Kyle was nowhere in sight, and Clary was getting desperate to leave, so they headed out the door without telling him goodbye. Parked in the driveway was what Clary assumed was Jace's metallic red Porsche 2008 Boxter. She let out a low whistle and dragged her hand across the front, sliding to a stop at the door handle. The interior was a soft, cream leather and once Clary had lowered herself into the passenger seat, she decided that she wouldn't be getting up any time soon.

"I'm starting to appreciate you're annoying insistance to drive me home, Wayland," she mumbled as her eyes closed and she relaxed back in the seat.

He chuckled, pulling the handle into reverse and doing a U-Turn out of the Garroway's driveway.

Somewhere, there was a bass guitar playing softly. Clary groaned as she pulled herself up from lying position her seat was in and searched the streets that they passed for a busker before realising it was a CD playing from Jace's radio. She hesitantly reached for the volume knob, waiting for Jace to tell her not to touch anything in his car, but he just watched her fingers and smirked as the got closer and closer, painfully slow. Clary pulled her hand back just in time to miss hitting Jace's in his motion to turn it up.

It was 'Sail On' by the Good Mad.

_A soul looking outside itself for the source  
To find what cannot be defined, delivered, or forced  
Perception and projection make up every point of view  
These days it seems like everyone is bidding on love  
But it's not up for sale, a concept new to some  
I like to share my soul with many, I don't save it just for one _

Who knew Jace had such good taste in music?

For the next few minutes, Clary found herself enjoying humming along to the song. Her vocal chords stopped producing sound though when the Fray house came into view. The girl signalled Jace to stop and reached to unbuckle her seat belt before she froze. Did she really want to go back into that lonely, dark house? From the outside, it was a beautiful, three story, designer house that half the people in New York would kill to live in. Inside, though, was a totally different story. It was gloomy and sad. Where Jocelyn's paintings used to hang, the spots were now filled with plans to upgrade the building of her law firm. All the walls were white, with dark, mahogany floor boards. Clary's bedroom had been the only colourful, happy sector of the house until a few days ago. All of her paintings had been beautiful and cheerful. Children playing, butterflies perched on branches, landscapes of the beautiful city, but lately they had become... _Too _cheery. Every single painting, Clary had studied for minutes, finding errors in them that she got furious about, throwing them onto the floor and chucking them under her bed. Now her walls were the plain white that the rest of the house was coloured. And when Jocelyn was home, her bitterness filled the house with a cold feeling.

"I don't want to go home," she muttered to herself, lost in thoughts and the realisation. Clary found it funny how one huge mistake, could make you realise so many things about yourself that you'd never even noticed before. For instance, she'd always hated her home, but she'd never realised just how scared she was of it. Scared of having to go back and lie on her bed, having no idea what to do with herself. No idea what to do about the fact that there was a living, growing human inside of her that wouldn't go away just because she wished it would.

"Then don't," Jace said it like it was the simplest thing in the world.

Clary scoffed. "I can't just pack my bags and live on the streets, Jace."

"Then don't do that either," and he started to drive. The lever was pushed into Drive and Clary felt the engine accelerate.

"Jace, stop the car!"

"Why? You said you don't want to go home. And I'm making myself responsible for you being as happy as you can be in this... _situation_. If there's anything I can do to help, I'm going to do it," Jace spared a second from keeping his eyes on the road to look at her. He smiled. The first genuine, kind smile she'd ever seen him wear. It was small, but it still made her skin tingle. "You're coming to my house. You can crash in the spare bedroom tonight, and I'm not letting you skip another day of school. Go while you still can. In a few months, you're either going to have to drop out of school or arrive at school and last the day with everyone laughing and staring at you."

"But... I..." Clary blubbered in astonishment. "I don't have any clothes, or makeup! Or shoes, or books. I'm totally unprepared, Jace. I can't just turn up to school naked with bed hair and no supplies."

Jace waved a hand airily and nodded his head to her hand bag. "Use that bag for school tomorrow. I have spare books you can use, just tell your teachers you left your usual ones at home. And my house isn't without hair brushes, Ginger."

"You're forgetting the most important part: Clothes," Clary stared at the boy like he was stupid.

Jace shrugged. "I don't think many boys are going to be opposed to you turning up nude."

Clary let out a sound of exclamation when the boy who sat across from her started laughing.

"I'm kidding, Ginger. My mom's a fashion designer, which means she always has samples of her work. I'm sure she won't even notice if you borrow some of her items."

Everyone knew who Jace's mom was; the famous Cecile Wayland. Designer for five different fashion magazines, as well as been chosen to create an entire line for a Runway shoot in Paris. Even Clary couldn't argue against wearing expensive, gorgeous designer clothes to school, if not to surprise people then to see the faces on the Skank Gang's faces.

"Fine," Clary sighed and gave in, extending her chair backwards so it was almost flat.

After half an hour, they entered the richest streets of New York; Lincoln Avenue. At the end, the street had a cul-de-sac. Clary had dreamed of living in this part of the city since she could remember. It had been her plan to buy one of the houses when she graduated, a sandstone, French styled house with a dolphin statue fountain at the front and a large window that covered the whole face of the fourth floor, looking out over the city. When Jocelyn had owned an art gallery a street North of Lincoln, Clary would always sneak out when her mother was focused on an artwork and follow the street down to the cul-de-sac. There was a gorgeous patch of meadow at the end of a trail that only Clary knew about, as far as she knew, apart from Simon. It was the only part of the city that hadn't been used up for apartments. The Secret Garden themed meadow had been Clary's hideaway when she was six. She'd run around and smell the flowers, go cloud watching and play hide and seek behind the trees with Simon.

"_This _is your street?" Clary exclaimed as they got to the far end of the road. She pushed her seat up so she could look out the window. And all of a there was a pang of fear in her gut. What would happen when Jocelyn finally did hear about Clary and the baby? The girl was doubtful her mother would let her anywhere near their home ever again. Where _would _she go? Clary had set up a bank account a few years ago when she'd first started working at Taki's part time and it held a couple of thousand dollars. But that couldn't buy you a house, and it would only cover the rent for a while. Even if she didn't keep the child, which was a discussion she wasn't ready to have with Jace, there was food expenses. And then there was college. She'd always wanted to get an arts degree. One stupid, crappy party that she hadn't even wanted to go to, and now all of this! It was shitty. Really, really shitty.

_I'm ruined. My life is gone, _she thought bluntly.

"Yeah, well, if you think most of the houses in this street are nice, you'll love mine. Personally, I think it's to over the top. I mean, there's no reason to have such a big home for a family of three. But my parents have always loved to flaunt whatever money can buy," Jace said the last part with a seething, cold tone.

"What's wrong with your parents?" Clary asked. She remembered their phone conversation last week when Jace had said that his parents never even noticed when he was gone.

"It's nothing," the boy waved it off.

"You've already knocked me up, and now you won't even answer one question," Clary said it like she was processing the facts. She looked up at him with her stunning emerald eyes. "Doesn't that seem a bit unfair to you?" the red head asked innocently.

Jace sighed and shook his head. "If you must know, there _is _nothing wrong with them. I mean, there isn't anything wrong with my mom. That's the problem. She's the perfect, American wife and the perfect, American mother. Not one has she ever yelled at me or told me off. When I ask for something, she gets it. But there's no feeling. It's as if she's a robot. There's about as much depth with her as there is with Kaelie. I just wish for once I could talk to my _mom_, not someone who looks like my mom on the outside, but has as much personality as Sesame Crackers have sugar."

"Sesame Crackers don't have sugar," Clary pointed out.

Jace looked at her grimly. "Exactly."

"What about your dad, what the prob - " She cut herself off and almost choked on her own tongue as Jace's Porsche turned into a driveway that was blocked from the house by a black gate with pointed arrows at the top.

"This can't be happening right now," she muttered as Jace leaned out his window and typed a code into a keypad that was ledged into a ground on a pole. The gates slowly opened and it was if Clary was entering a movie.

The house had four stories, and was painted a light cream colour next to the sandstone pillars. They drove around the dolphin statue water fountain and parked directly in front of the house, at which point Clary was fixated on the whole of the fourth floor that's entire front wall was a glass window.

"What do you think?" Jace asked as he came around to the girl's door and opened it for her. She didn't move.

"I used to dream about owning this house. I always imagined myself living here with two children and a perfect husband, owning a little art gallery down the road and owning a St Bernard called Nana. You know, from Peter Pan?"

Jace failed at holding back a grin. "How old were you when you dreamed of this exactly?"

"Five," Clary admitted. "There's this gorgeous meadow past the cul-de-sac that I used to play in. It was like my little hide away."

Jace's next words were unexpected. "Show me."

"What?" Clary said, taken aback.

"Show me the meadow," he repeated.

Clary let out a shocked breath. "Maybe tomorrow, Jace," she said. "At the moment I'm just exhausted."

"Oh, yeah, of course," Jace frowned and nodded, unsure of what to do next. "Come and I'll introduce you to your room for the night."

Being inside the house gave Clary this unbelievable feeling. As much as she had always loved the house, she'd never seen the interior. It didn't disappoint, though. Actually, it did the opposite. If the exterior of the house was beautiful, inside was ten times that.

"Jonathan, there you are!" A grand, posh voice came from the top of the spiral stairs along with the sound of clicking high heels. Clary looked up to see who she could only guess was Jace's mother. She was slim and tall with stunning clothes and a beautiful face to go with it.

"_Jonathan_?" Clary giggled under her breath. She couldn't picture Jace as a Jonathan at all.

He did a small shrug and whispered so his mother wouldn't hear as she made her way down the stairs gracefully. "Jonathan Christopher. The initials are J.C, somehow it just turned to Jace. Tell anyone and I'll have lock you up in the cellar."

"You have a _cellar?" _Clary whisper-shouted.

"Where else is there to keep all the dead bodies?" Jace said dead pan.

Celine clapped her hands, making Clary jump back. She hadn't realised that Jace's mother had come right up to them. She was wearing a flowing, red dress that fell onto the ground behind her in a pool of silk. Her hair was like Jace's; a beautiful golden colour, like Clary imagined an Angel's hair to be like. Embracing the young girl in a warm, very overly dramatic embrace, Clary had to stop herself from gagging at the strong, spicy perfume that the woman was wearing.

"Kaelie! It's about time we finally met. I've been telling Jace, I don't care what he does in his room as long as he keeps it quiet and I who's up there with him," Celine beamed.

Clary stood there, gobsmacked. Was she implying what Clary thought she was implying? Obviously. A startled sound came out of her mouth and she snapped it shut quickly.

"Mom, this is _Clary_," Jace hissed and his mother with a 'Shut the hell up' kind of look. It was one he used most often on Freshman when they came up asking for popularity tips or tried to start a conversation with him.

Jace's mother's smile faltered for a second before she perked straight back up and laughed a high, giggly laugh. Clary already disliked her horrendously. But who would she be if she rejected an offer to stay in her dream home for a night?

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mrs Wayland," Clary almost choked on the words. It was actually the total opposite. Clary would not let Jace tell anyone that he was the reason for what was happening to her, even if the only reason was to keep Celine from befriending and comforting her. It was actually a good point, though. Did she want people to know that the baby was Jace's? It might not even matter, if it was going to go up for adoption. But just the thought of it made Clary want to puke. There were three options. One was an abortion, but that was already crossed off and out of the question. Second was adoption, and third was Clary being a single mother, high-school drop out, living in a cheap apartment in the bad part of New York and being able to do nothing with her life. In the back of her mind, though, there was another possibility trying to squirm it's way into her mind; Jace.

"Aw, call me Celine, sweetheart," the woman said in her annoying, high pitched, nasally voice. If the resemblance between her and Jace hadn't been so strong, Clary would have been questioning if Celine was related to Kaelie.

"If you don't mind, _mother_, I'm going to show Clary to her room. She's staying the night and coming with me to school tomorrow," Jace said in a tone of authority. "Oh yeah, and also, she'll be borrowing some of the clothes from your sample rack."

Celine raised her eyebrows at her son and then glanced back and forth between him and Clary for several moments, finally letting her amber eyes settle on Clary. "First time I've heard of my son not inviting a girl to share _his _bed. He must respect you," Celine sounded surprised. "A lot."

Jace groaned. "Can we not start with the mushy relationship advice about how much I love Clarissa and how if I hurt her you'll be 'so very dissapointed' in me? Because it doesn't matter, Mom. We aren't together, she's just..." he stopped and frowned, looking up in thought, which made Clary start thinking as well. What were they, really? Friends? A married couple? Acquaintances? Boyfriend and girlfriend? Truthfully, they weren't any of those things. They weren't anything.

"A friend in some trouble," Jace finally mumbled and pushed past his mother, dragging Clary with him.

It took effort to walk up the staircase, and Clary was almost ready to drop down to the floor as the reached the top. Her stomach was cramping and swirling around; churning. She let out a groan of pain and stopped to inhale a few deep breaths.

Jace turned back and looked at her with deep concern.

"It's not supposed to be this bad," Clary told him quietly. She looked up to the boy with large eyes under her long red lashes.

"Then why is it?" It was like Jace had been expecting her to say that, because he had asked before she'd even finished her last word. "I've seen my mother's friends who've been a few weeks, Clary, and you can't even tell that they're pregnant. But you look like you've caught a vicious plague and should be rushed to the emergency department of the closest hospital."

Clary let out a small, frustrated sound and leant against the light blue coloured wall of the hallway. "Because I'm tiny. I'm 16, but I'm the size of a small 13 year old. Everything that's there in the second week of pregnancy but not noticed, is the same with me, but magnified. I've been reading about it. The cramps, the fatigue, the hunger, the sore joints... Everyone has it at two weeks, but it's so little that no one complains about it. What people experience at six months, I'm experiencing now."

"Shit, Ginger," Jace muttered.

Clary shrugged and ignored the nick name as much as it pissed her off. "I'm fine."

The boy let out a surprised laugh. "No, you're not. Nothing about this is fine! This is serious. If you're this bad now, imagine what it's going to be like at eight months. Dammit, you might not even _make _it to eight months," he yelled out in exclamation.

"Shut up!" Clary hissed.

"Did I..." he started in a deadly soft tone. He just looked at the ground, and Clary watched as the rage in him built up. "I hurt you."

"Yeah, well, we have bigger things to worry about than our difference in size 'down there'."

"I'm so sorry. For everything." And then, he reassured one of her worst fears. "I'm not going to run away and tell you to do this all by yourself, not now anyway. I can't promise what happens in the future, but for right now, I can promise that I'll help you in any way I can. Not going to any extremes, though."

Relief flooded her entire body and she slid down the wall and onto the ground in a slippery, stop and start motion. It hurt as her back skidded, but once she was lying down, curled up, it was like heaven. The waves of fatigue had decided to stay with her and her eyes shut so quickly that she didn't see Jace coming over towards her. Even the floor felt comfortable all of a sudden. The last thing that Clary remembered before falling to sleep was Jace picking up her rag doll body and carrying her down the hall, the feel of his warm breath close to her neck.

"Which do you prefer? The lilac cardigan," Clary held up in her left hand a cute purple cashmere item that was just her size, "Or this aqua crop," she wiggled her right hand in the air. It was hot outside for Fall, and Clary was surprised at how good she felt to be going back to school. It wasn't school that she was looking forward to exactly, but more seeing the reactions on everyone's faces and Clary Fray walked down the hall in Celine Wayland's clothes before they'd even been released to the most elite, expensive, boutiques.

On the animal skin chair of Celine's designing room, there were already a few items sitting neatly on the seat; a tanned, soft leather hand bag. Round, nude coloured sunglasses. And cream ballet flats with a black ring around the inside.

Jace swivelled from side to side in an office chair, pursing his lips and stroking his imaginary beard. He was dressed up in pointy, black sunglasses – a lot like Lady Gaga's pair but even more extraordinary – and a pink and red striped waist coat. "Neither," he waved an airy hand in the air and spoke with his fake, posh British accent and pouty lip. "The cardigan makes you look like a study nerd. A _cute_ study nerd, but a study nerd none the less. And the crop makes you look even more flat chested than you are, not to mention making your eyes look extremely dull."

Clary dropped both to the floor in exasperation and pulled three more racks from the walk in wardrobe out and into Jace's view. "You've declined the last ten items I've shown you, so obviously I have no fashion taste whatsoever."

Jace nodded in agreement.

"So," Clary said slowly. "It's your turn. _You _can find me some clothes to wear while I go and raid those sample boxes of make-up," she pointed a finger towards to other side of the room where hundreds of small boxes were stacked neatly, full of cosmetics.

The girl didn't look back, but she could hear Jace rifling through silk and satin, the metal coat hangers scraping the tops of the racks and clothes were pulled from one side to the other. Clary was getting more and more curious to see what Jace was choosing, but she managed to keep herself occupied by smearing on some baby pink lipstick and dabbing a bit of clear gloss over it. Coincidently, just her colour of concealer and foundation was in the first box she opened so she smoothed both over her face for a fresh, clear skin look.

"And the magestical, intelligent, stunning Jace Wayland is finished!" Jace announced in a grand voice that almost made Clary poke the mascara stick into her eyeball.

She spun herself around and her mouth dropped open. "Are you sure you aren't gay? Because I've never once met a straight guy that has as good fashion taste as you."

Jace shrugged slightly and a proud grin pushed it's way onto his face. "What can I say? I know what looks good on a girl."

He held a dark, deep emerald green strapless dress the was short at the front but trailed down to become longer at the back. Just under the chest, was a thin, firm gold belt. Next to the dress, hanging from Jace's pinkie finger, was a lighter, mint green, three quarter sleeved blazer. "Now _this_, will make your eyes look dazzling, and make you look ravishing," Jace said with a wink.

Clary suppressed a smile and remained professional, showing a nod of approval and extending her hand in offer to take the garments from Jace.

They looked at each other and shared a devilish, amused glance.

This was going to be fun.

_Thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, nineteen, twenty five_.

Thirty three people in total started at Clary as she walked down the East Wing of Waverney's halls and the attention was already getting to her. But not in a good way. She kept tugging the line of the dress up pulling her blazer down, twiddling her fingers, staring at the floor and walking awkwardly. That was one of the keys to Kaelie and Aline's popularity. They were confident. If popularity was only based on looks at Waverney, then Clary would be hands down whipping Aline and Kaelie's asses at the moment in her killer outfit, sunglasses rested on top of her head and handbag hanging from her elbow. But it wasn't just judged on the clothes you wore, although that was a big part of it. People also analysed you about how confident you were and how much you cared about them, well, analysing you. That's what got Aline and Kaelie and their group to the top, because they walked through the halls with killer looks, their heads held high and their walk flawless. And that's also what made Maia fall a little behind them, always hurrying behind and following orders. Because she was drop dead gorgeous, no argument there, but just not as comfortable.

Clary wished she could just run to the nearest bathroom and change into a gaming tee and a pair of old skinny jeans and go out blending back into the crowd. Unfortunately, her handbag could only fit a phone, extra make-up, and an apple.

Shit.

Panic was rising from her stomach and turning into puke as it came up her oesophagus. She had to swallow several times for it to go back down the direction it was supposed to go. Clary's step faltered and she almost came to a complete sudden halt when Kaelie's group came into view and she turned the corner. That moment, she just wished that Jace could have stayed by her side instead of him having to drop her around the corner from school so they wouldn't even be seen walking together. Even though he'd said it was 'to protect them both from accusations', it had still hurt as he awkwardly tried to find a way to ask Clary to get out of the car. Now she was just by herself, lonely. Until a gangly boy with glasses too big, carrying a dozen text books in his thin arms came pushing through the middle of the popular girls group clumsily.

Clary let herself smile slightly. "Simon," she breathed.

"Excuse me, coming through. Oh, sorry," he apologised as he trod on Maia's foot but kept on bulleting through the group of girls and over to Clary. His smile told her that he was just as relieved to her and she was him.

"Clary!" he exclaimed, opening his arms for a hug, forgetting that he was still carrying all his school books in his arms. Clary was used to this and she immediately bent down to catch the books before they hit the floor. Although last time she'd done it, she hadn't been knocked up. This time when she did it, pain shot through her stomach and it hurt like a bitch. "My bad," Simon apologised as Clary came slowly back up and handed him the books. "Where have you been?! And don't give me any of that sickness crap, I won't believe it for a second."

"Let's talk about this - "

"Are you, like, secretly pregnant or something? Did you have to go to a special medical centre to get an abortion without Jocelyn finding out?" Simon joked, making Clary swallow loudly and answer in a fake laugh.

"Totally," she said sarcastically. "I'll tell you about it later, Si, let's just get to class."

Right on time, the warning bell sounded, signalling everyone that they had five minutes until they were expected in class.

"So," Clary searched for a subject changer and finally came upon one after thinking of where things had left off in their last conversation. "Have you had any chance to use that girl advice that I wisely handed over to you for free?"

Simon smiled sadly and gestured for them to start walking to Creative Arts, also known as the one class of the week where everyone just got to sit back and watch old fashioned movies. This lesson, they would be halfway through the Scarlett Letter, the original. Not the Demi Moore version, that Clary despised openly. "I haven't really had a chance to use it yet," Simon admitted sheepishly. "Haven't seen her that much the past few days, for a while I thought she was avoiding me. So, my love life is still on step one."

"Better than having my love life," Clary mumbled quiet enough for only herself to hear, or so she thought.

"_You _have a love life?" Simon exclaimed. Luckily, everyone surrounding them was caught up in their own conversations, or Clary would have had some serious explaining to do. "Since when? Who with?"

Clary was saved from having to answer her best friend's question when Ms Faulkner, their teacher for first period, ushered them into the room, where the black and white movie had already started playing.

"Did I mention how different you look?" Simon hissed under his breath. "In a good way, of course. I think."

Clary gave him a smile before they parted to opposite sides of the class room in their planned seating.

For forty minutes of the lesson, Clary paid no attention whatsoever to the film and instead doodled on the front cover of her book, drawing children and hands intertwined and wedding rings. Finally, the movie came to the end credits and Kaelie shot her hand up in lightning speed, casting a dirty glance back at Clary.

"Miss, maybe Clarissa should print a 'P' for prostitute across her forehead. It only seems fitting," Kaelie said sweetly, giggling at the end, only to be joined by the rest of the girls who sat around her. And well, pretty much the rest of the class apart from Simon.

Clary's hormonal, pregnant self was desperate to come out of it's shell, and this time, Clary allowed it to. She stood up from her seat, kicking her chair back violently and stalking up to lean forward at the front of Kaelie's desk with a deathly glare. She quickly took some happiness out of watching the skank's jealous expression at the red head's new clothing choices.

If there was one feeling that the school had for Clarissa Fray, apart from disrespect and the humour they got out of what a 'nerd' she was, they felt fear. After hitting Jacob Winston over the head with her hockey stick in middle school because he called her a cheating hockey player, the story and video got leaked out to high school, and by her first day as a Freshman, everyone was a little bit intimidated by her.

"Watch out Kaelie, she might go running and grab her hockey stick. Then you'll end up with a broken nose and sliced head like Jacob," one of Clary's classmates that she couldn't put a name to called out from the back of the class. A few cackled, but most were too frightened to do a thing. On the other hand, Ms Faulkner was sitting back in her desk chair with amused interest.

"I'll do more than grab it," Clary said through gritted teeth. "If you don't shut your slutty mouth, you plastic skank, I swear to God I will hit you so hard, you're teeth will fall out. And no one wants to kiss a cake faced whore with fake teeth now, do they?" Kaelie was reeling back in her seat to get as far away from the crazy girl as possible by this point. "So you better shut the hell up, or I will get Ja - " her vocal cords cut themselves off in a moment, and she was glad. Because she'd been stupid, and pushed it too far. The momentary thought that Jace was 'her's' to threaten people with was gone as Clary talked some sense into herself. The feeling of being in power had also vanished, and Kaelie seemed to know it, because she pulled forward in her seat so that the girl's faces were only inches apart.

"Or you'll get who? Jace _Wayland_?" she laughed her annoying, high pitched laugh that made Clary seriously consider running to grab her hockey stick. "What the hell do _you_ know about Jace? He doesn't even know your name, you little no hoper. So piss off back to your brothel and leave the rest of us alone, because guess what? You don't threaten me the slightest. You don't own Jace, and you never will. You will always be under vermin in the food chain, and he will be up there with the Gods."

For the rest of the day, all the way up to lunch break, Clary hung her head low with shame. The whole of Junior class and some of Senior already knew about her little tantrum in class, but the comments about Jace had faded. Clary was glad, because if Jace found out she was using him to threaten girls, it would just make their situation even more awkward.

Simon had gone home sick after Advanced English, and every single table in the cafeteria, and outside of it for that matter, was taken. It was the most embarrassing feeling in the world to stand in the middle of the large school cafeteria searching for a spot to sit. One table, though, kept beating out to her, and not just because every girl around was staring at the five boys who sat around it in adoration, but because one of them was standing up, waving his arms and calling to her.

Clary groaned as people turned from Kyle Garroway to her in confusion.

"That's Kyle's _cousin_. Can you believe it?" One person whispered rather loudly as Clary walked past them, finding herself doing the most jaw dropping thing that Waverney had ever seen. There was almost a school law against what she was about to do, but Clary was still doing it with an enormous amount of guts.

Sitting around the table that she was heading to, was, – obviously – her cousin, Kyle. He sat next to the boy who was holding most of the girls' attention and hearts, and whom Clary was holding his baby. The one and only, Jace Wayland. On the other side of him sat Jonathan Morgenstern, a Junior who the rest of the senior boys approved of because of his talented football skills. The other two were good looking senior boys that Clary didn't know the names of, but she'd seen them around following Jace and Kyle all the time.

Kyle watched her in a familiar sense of approval along with his signature smirk and pushed the Jace away from him to make a small spot in between. He patted the seat for Clary to sit down and she hesitantly placed her food tray down gently on the table before swinging her legs over the hoop bench that circled the round table.

"I knew you'd take me up on my offer," Kyle beamed at her, ruffling her neatly placed curls in a joking gesture. "You look _hot_ by the way. With a capital H," he added. "Like, if I wasn't your cousin, I'd be seriously into you."

"It's such a shame that your dad is related to my mom, then, isn't it?" Clary joked, finding herself in a position that could possibly end up in her laughing. It had been the first time she'd been in that position in weeks, and she liked it. A lot.

Clary looked shyly around at the rest of the table and they waved at her kindly, in a way one would smile at their best friend's little sister. Finally, her gaze rested upon Jace and she felt Kyle tense up beside her. He was looking at her in surprise, and continued to do so and Kyle relaxed and the rest of the group started in conversation once again.

He bent down ever so slightly and whispered in her ear. "To answer your question earlier: Seeing you now, I can tell you for certain, that I am definitely, positively, _certainly_ not gay."

"You shouldn't be doing this."

Clary stood at the edge of Waverney's concrete slab that they called the hockey field. It was funny, because the person they hired had put the lines the wrong way across the rectangle and random lengths apart, so it looked more like a soccer field than a hockey area. She wore the yellow and blue Waverney colours on her short skirt and polo shirt, holding her lucky, bright purple hockey stick.

"And you shouldn't be here," Clary pointed out while keeping her eyes on the group of players the whole time. "Defence, Spencer! You're letting Jaime get through when you could easily be blocking her outer passage so she has nowhere to go!" the girl yelled out.

She was met with the reply of Spencer mumbling, "Yes, captain."

"After you're little scene that you made when you decided to sit down with _Senior boys_, everyone will assume I'm here either to tell you off or hook up with you."

"You have it all figured out, don't you?" Clary muttered sarcastically.

Jace looked at the girl meaningfully, but she didn't return the gaze. "Not everything."

A loud buzz of the half time bell left everyone's ears ringing even after the bell itself had stopped. Clary gave Jace a quick wave before running over to the other side of the field where her team was huddled around, her red hair bouncing from side to side in it's tight pony tail.

Clary knew that Jace was right; she shouldn't even be near anyone playing hockey. It was dangerous for anyone. Especially a pregnant, delicate, tiny sized girl. But it was too early to give up everything she was interested in. She'd already had to drop out of science because of the chemicals in the lab, and instead take up the Bahai religion. She couldn't have any sort of a love life unless she wanted it to be with a certain blonde douche bag, which maybe wouldn't be such a bad thing... _No!_ Clary shook her head at the thought and turned her attention to the team who was waiting intently on her advice.

"Spencer and Carly, you're off for this training session, I just want you to watch. I'll take your position, Spence. Bridget, you go in for Carly."

The girls nodded and everyone who wasn't playing this session went to get drinks.

The game was started quickly and Clary was becoming very anxious, very quickly. So many hockey sticks, they were everywhere. So close to her stomach. She found herself flinching every time someone swung back to hit a bit near her and was too afraid to get into the middle of any ridge. The girls who were pretending to be the offence team caught possession of the ball and Clary turned her body, ready to run to the other end of the field and give Christy, who was playing Goal Keeper, a break. But three steps East and she froze. Everyone, once realising the Clary wasn't about to move, got the idea that they had to run around her, but only after a few bumps to the shoulder. No one even bothered to see what their captain was looking at because they were too busy trying to stop Bridget who was so close to scoring. And Clary was glad, because she was the only one that Kaelie was here for.

The tall, slim, gorgeous Barbie doll smirked and raised the tips of her cherry red lips when she realised she had Clary's attention. It wasn't Kaelie that Clary was interested in, though. The red head's eyes travelled to what Kaelie was swinging lightly in between her finger tips. A fabric, cut out letter 'P'.

"I couldn't get a tattooist in at the last minute, but I figured this will do for the mean time. It's quite handy too, you just stick it on," Kaelie peeled the sticky back off and stuck it on herself as an example. "And it's done! Then everyone will know what a low life, slut you really are."

It wasn't Clary's hormones that were kicking in to furious. It was the old Clary, the one who kicked Jacob Winston's ass just for an insult he'd whispered behind her back. The one who smart mouthed and threatened anyone who was rude to her or gave her a dirty look. The bad ass Clary from middle school. And this time, it felt good. It felt so damn good, when she stalked straight off the field, hockey stick in hand, and hit Kaelie across the face.

**Okay, so that's it for Chapter 4 everyone :) I know it's a bit confusing as to what Jace's reaction is, him being frustrated in the beginning and then kind and then pissed off and then worried, but it's going to be very, very definite in the next chapter or two, don't worry. **

**So, now that this story's getting a bit of attention (Thank you so much to everyone who's following, favouriting and reviewing, every single one of you means so much to me!), I'm going to be needing a BETA. I've had a temporary one, but she's never able to go on FanFic anymore, and I can't live without a BETA. It means you get the chapters early, get to give me advice and ideas that I promise to listen to, get to know what's happening in the future. You'll sort of be like my second in command :) So if you're interested, please PM me!**

**Let's get to 75 reviews for this chapter, pleeeease? Anyways, you won't have to wait long for Chapter 5, so relax! It's going to be a good one. Isn't Kaelie just such a bitch?! ;) **

**Also, this is just a question for fun that you can add to your reviews... How old do you reckon I am? I'm just interested to see what age I come off as, that's all. **

**Sooooo, as usual:**

**Read, Review and PM me, my Darling readers **

**XOXO**

****The Polyvore link to Clary's outfit that she wore to school is on my profile, really easy to find. Please check it out and tell me what you think! No hate, I'm a writer... Not a fashion designer.****


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